tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20999034142384474072024-03-13T20:56:53.606+00:00Diary of an Incompetent SopranoA blog about singing! All singing! Opera, classical, pop, jazz, buskers, professionals and amateurs.Bouchehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11174056470461569566noreply@blogger.comBlogger118125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2099903414238447407.post-22039063056106774742023-04-16T14:46:00.000+00:002023-04-16T14:46:02.613+00:00An Incompetent stream of consciousness.....Nothing new there then!<p>Ooh things were going so well back in January. A couple of posts in quick succession and then I completely neglected you. Until now.</p><p>I am not going to promise to post next week or even more often as it doesn't work. I obviously don't really care about accountability plus, being, a woman of a certain age, going through the thing most women my age go through, I can not commit to anyone other than myself right now. Sometimes I can't even commit to myself (if that makes any sense. It does to me). What I will say is I will post again but I will not commit to a time line!</p><p>So what shall we talk about today? I actually don't know but I knew I wanted to write something and, as that feeling is almost non-existent these days, thought I would just start before the feeling disappeared again.</p><p>It is the end of the Easter holidays. Back to work tomorrow. That's fine. I actually had a pretty good holiday apart from a couple of days in self-isolation because of Covid (I wasn't ill with it but I had it and did my moral duty and stayed away from people) and then I had a small spell of vertigo yesterday which was particularly annoying as I LOVE a Saturday off and was planning to make the most of it but instead had to spend the day in bed sleeping and binge watching stuff on Prime and the like. </p><p>I am coming into my busiest term. Normally the summer term is the easiest but the theatre school I teach at has it's big show in June and my choir has 2 big concerts planned/booked this term. I normally put the choir concerts on after the school term has finished but no, not this time, I thought I would give myself a ridiculous amount to do this year and get everything done and dusted before the schools break up. It's either a brilliant move or a crazy one. I'll tell you which it was mid-July.</p><p>Although I am still a little lazy and lacking in motivation, I am definitely better than I was. I am slightly better prepared for everything I have going on and no longer constantly tired. I still get tired but not to the point that I can't do anything.</p><p>I turned 49 a couple of weeks ago and have decided that I am going to write a list (not a bucket list per se, although I suppose it is a bucket list for the end of my 40s) of things I want to do before I'm 50. I haven't gotten around to it yet but I will start writing it when I've finished with you.</p><p>When I was 39 I decided I wanted to get fit as I wanted to be as healthy as I possibly could be in order to live well for longer in life. I definitely got fitter but fell off the wagon at about 46 for a while. I got back on the horse and am trying to regain a little of what I have lost, fitness wise, over the past 3 years so getting fitter can definitely go on my "Farewell to my 40s" list. </p><p>I have absolutely NO idea what I want to achieve over the next year but I want to achieve something. I don't want to do anything too crazy. I don't want to skydive or go to America or anything like that. I don't even have aspirations to own property anymore as that is nigh on impossible now. Given my time again I would have bought something back in 2003/4 when I had the most well-paid job of my career and probably would have got some sort of mortgage but now it really ain't going to happen unless I save up enough to buy something outright or win the lottery. </p><p>I think my list will be full of practical, sensible things but it might be nice to include a couple of silly things I would still like to do but my brain fog is making it hard to bring them to the forefront of my mind right now. Perhaps a bit of meditation would help. I tried meditation a few years ago but these days I have to multitask whilst doing everything these days. Actually, having said that, I am writing this with no distractions whatsoever. No radio, no TV nothing. Just writing. That hardly ever happens!</p><p>I have nothing more to say right now so I'm going to love you and leave you. But I will leave you with 2 things. The first is a link to my Enlightened Singer blog. Click <a href="https://www.enlightenedsinger.com/post/fear-of-failure-or-fear-of-success-part-2" target="_blank">here</a> to be redirected there and also click <a href="https://www.facebook.com/groups/183601153509924" target="_blank">here</a> to come and join the Enlightened Singer Facebook group. You would be very welcome. In addition below is a video I uploaded to YouTube. I just completed another 12 weeks on The Sing Space 16 Bar Challenge. This song, Parents Lie from Freaky Friday, was the last song we were given and it was one of my faves. Pop over to Instagram and follow The Incompetent Soprano there, again, you would be very welcome or follow me on YouTube.</p><p>Until next time, whenever that might be, enjoy!</p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen="" class="BLOG_video_class" height="266" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/v3Yij5KRrOQ" width="320" youtube-src-id="v3Yij5KRrOQ"></iframe></div><br /><p><br /></p>Bouchehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11174056470461569566noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2099903414238447407.post-60223528159477975912023-01-07T08:00:00.006+00:002023-01-07T08:00:00.187+00:00Money, Money, Money.....or lack thereof<p>Well, how's this for being on top of things? Two posts in one week. I can't promise that will happen every week (I'm sure you're breathing a sigh of relief as I write this) but I intend to use this as a kind of journal for 2023 so I am certainly aiming for two posts a week but am committing to one!</p><p>So why are you writing this at all? I hear you ask. Well as a freelancer, money is something that needs to be thought about quite a lot as the amount I have coming in can fluctuate from month to month. The past year I have been quite good at budgeting. Or so I thought. Suddenly I find myself teetering on a knife edge and having to scrimp and save more than I have had to in a long time.</p><p>I am not alone in this, I know. There are many a lot worse off than me. I still have enough money to buy cheese so I can not complain too loudly. In fact I'm not complaining at all. Prices for most things in life have gone up but I think this did not register with me fully until now. </p><p>I have become a little obsessed with TikTok recently and two college girls did some daft TikTok about telling yourself "I am lucky. Everything goes right for me" or summat like that. I decided to try it as I have been thinking about trying some manifestation techniques in January. It can't hurt to try this new mantra every day, I thought. Well 2 days after starting this my printer gave up the ghost and I had to spend £200 to replace it. So I am done with that mantra. On to something else I say.</p><p>Manifestation aside, I am going to try spending no money throughout January and February. This does not include food and other essentials (although I intend to buy less cheese). I have a few vouchers for free coffees on my Costa and Nero apps so I can still have the odd treat but I won't have to pay for it. I may also tidy my flat properly so I can invite friends round and not have to go out to meet them. I have never done a proper budget before but I fully intend to now. As a single lady, NOT in want of a husband, I have to make sure I can look after myself (although I am lucky that the bank of Mum and Dad is still available to me should I find myself in dire straits (not the band)) and that means saving, and saving properly.</p><p>I must use all the willpower available to me to stop me buying frivolous nonsense anymore. A treat is just that, a treat! Not something to have everyday. It has taken me until, almost, 50 to realise this but, better late than never I say.</p><p>So, having said in the last post that I had no intention of making new years resolutions, I AM going to make a couple. One is to budget and to be slightly more financially secure by December 2023 and the other, completely unrelated to anything in this post, is to average 8000 steps a day in 2023. In 2022 I averaged 5200 steps per day so I reckon I can manage 8000 this year. More would be better but I am trying to be realistic.</p><p>I hope you are all OK and not struggling where money is concerned. These are strange days we are living in right now so I think the more we can find joy in things that cost nothing at all, the better! That said I do have a Ko-Fi account (link is somewhere on this page) so if you enjoy reading my nonsense and fancy paying for a coffee from time to time I would be most grateful. No pressure!</p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjA_vbnorb0MQbzFXeqP-kP2xGEkL8kUVjzYuZPLkemAd98ciZXCVXBOvBkptMYEz3pLZZjwy8pmTZV6slfm77akpryTAVpoyzUGsqQlq11KKtsRAZRl5cDfv4T1ks7JeFdaE9fwKKvNVH9gDucC1reY0xI4gzks1o8bDLHQonjtosGbz6vyYcjuk-kkw/s1080/Time%20to%20save.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1080" data-original-width="1080" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjA_vbnorb0MQbzFXeqP-kP2xGEkL8kUVjzYuZPLkemAd98ciZXCVXBOvBkptMYEz3pLZZjwy8pmTZV6slfm77akpryTAVpoyzUGsqQlq11KKtsRAZRl5cDfv4T1ks7JeFdaE9fwKKvNVH9gDucC1reY0xI4gzks1o8bDLHQonjtosGbz6vyYcjuk-kkw/s320/Time%20to%20save.png" width="320" /></a></div><br /><p><br /></p>Bouchehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11174056470461569566noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2099903414238447407.post-18679743716453601112023-01-03T18:18:00.000+00:002023-01-03T18:18:02.381+00:00You did what???....don't get too excited<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhBP060Natqja6R9NenuxadkMlODqOwqKDrfLRiokaqwrkVBFLKJvIwpdc0QbvZQmFoVgVTrCp9mQyt860XgryvUCKXi8njF95jALCTnbfEx2EJMC0iknPIKCDtp12UYAQcT4K3sKL_aNyN3WvmYyY171aZxo8lO-ZSnjUGqAnnUO61-yzDOFvP3rWwPA/s1080/You%20did%20what.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1080" data-original-width="1080" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhBP060Natqja6R9NenuxadkMlODqOwqKDrfLRiokaqwrkVBFLKJvIwpdc0QbvZQmFoVgVTrCp9mQyt860XgryvUCKXi8njF95jALCTnbfEx2EJMC0iknPIKCDtp12UYAQcT4K3sKL_aNyN3WvmYyY171aZxo8lO-ZSnjUGqAnnUO61-yzDOFvP3rWwPA/w200-h200/You%20did%20what.png" width="200" /></a></div><br /><p>I wanted to tell you about this at 9am this morning (it's now 4.15pm) but I have spent the whole day being productive. I really haven't stopped ALL DAY! </p><p>I am now going to bore you with the ins and outs of my morning and how I managed to get a bit of motivation. Whether you want to hear about it or not!</p><p>So, this morning I woke up at about 7am. I got up, made a coffee and went back to bed to waste a bit of time on soshul meeja. At about 7.30 I suddenly had the urge to get up and go for a walk. Something like this vary rarely happens in the morning so I didn't think, I just got up, got dressed, put my headphones in my ears and chose a podcast to accompany my walk. </p><p>It wasn't a sunny morning but it wasn't raining and wasn't too cold so conditions were definitely acceptable. I only walked for half an hour but I did it. I can't guarantee it will happen again but I hope it does as I ended up getting so many little bits and pieces done upon my return. I still have a to-do list as long as your arm but I did a couple of things I've been putting off so that felt like a HUGE weight had been lifted.</p><p>The podcast I listened to wasn't technically a podcast, it was more of an audio masterclass or a webinar without pictures. It was led by Elizabeth Gilbert, who wrote Eat, Pray, Love, and was called "Creative Living Beyond Fear". Not a title I would normally be excited by but I was in such a rush to get out on my walk that I picked it quickly. I'm glad I listened, though, as she really had some pearls of wisdom. I won't give away all her secrets as I listened to it on the Calm app and it's summat you have to pay for. However, I will tell you one thing she said.</p><p>I am constantly moaning about how little spare time I have. I really want to write and record an online course but I keep finding anything else to do rather than work on it. In a nutshell one thing somebody said to Elizabeth in her 20s was that in order to make time for her passion (writing, in her case) she would not only have to say no to the things she didn't really want to do but also say no to the things she did. </p><p>I don't DO a lot of stuff other than work but there is nothing I like more than plonking myself down on the sofa and watching TV until my eyes go square so perhaps I need to be tougher on myself and not allow myself to watch as much TV and I DEFINITELY need to get off my phone as it is permanently fixed to my hand right now. </p><p>So that's as near to a New Years Resolution I will get this year but I am going to attempt to halve the time I spend looking at screens and I'm also going to try and go for a walk early in the morning whenever the urge comes upon me again!</p><p><br /></p>Bouchehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11174056470461569566noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2099903414238447407.post-19815693774661358002022-12-21T20:26:00.000+00:002022-12-21T20:26:14.357+00:00All I want for Christmas is motivation!<p>It’s been a while hasn’t it? As we approach the New Year it, as always, I am thinking about making New Years resolutions. I don’t often keep them and by the end of January I am beating myself up for not having more willpower. So perhaps this time I should just not make any and resolve to work on my battle with procrastination instead.</p><p>If you are an avid reader of this diary you will know that it has been suggested to me that I may be suffering from ADHD and this is why I have no motivation, can not concentrate on one task at a time and avoid doing the important things. However, I refuse to jump on the bandwagon. The world and his wife has some sort of attention deficit disorder (with or without the hyperactivity) but I think that’s life right now. I am in no way trying to say that if you have ADHD you should not seek help for it, you absolutely should, I just know I need to deal with whatever is going on myself.</p><p>To be perfectly honest, I think most of my problems stem from perimenopause rather than ADHD but I’m not going to discuss that right now. I will save that for another post. So what do I do about my lack of motivation? There are some aspects of my life that do not suffer because of a lack of motivation. I am always motivated when it comes to one part of my work life and that is my choir, Songsations. I say MY choir, yes I set it up and I run it as a one-man-band but I feel it belongs as much to the ladies who join it now as it does to me. We have just broken up for Christmas and did a number of really successful concerts over the past few weeks. I take a small amount of credit for how good they are but the majority of the credit has to go to the members and their commitment (although I must say it’s been a tough term with illness and the crazy cold spell we just went through).</p><p>I think the reason I am motivated to do the work for the choir is that they are also motivated and we keep each other going. Other aspects of my work life are not quite as straightforward. My private teaching relies heavily on the motivation of the student I’m teaching. Of course, I recognise that my job is to help people improve their singing, grow their confidence and enjoy the time they are paying for and I think I’m pretty good at delivering this but it can be very hard when people come for a lesson with no idea what they want to sing or work on in a lesson. I do find teaching quite draining these days and am thinking that I perhaps need to cut down on the amount I’m doing but we’ll see how 2023 pans out first.</p><p>The other aspect of my working life that needs looking at is my own singing. I haven’t really done much with my own singing recently, apart from the 16 Bar Challenge I did with The Sing Space a couple of months ago. I had to record 12 videos over 12 weeks and upload them to a private Facebook group, each week having a different genre to explore. I really enjoyed this until I realised there was going to be a “winner” picked for each category and I did not “win” any of them. This threw me into a proper downward spiral and started I started doubting my ability and decided I would never sing in public or on a video ever again. I am over this now and am about to embark upon another 16 Bar Challenge in the new year so, unfortunately for you, there will be more of my singing coming your way in the new year and, to be honest, I don’t really care what anyone thinks. At nearly 50 I am determined to only do things that make me happy and it won’t matter to me what anybody thinks of me or if I “win” any competitions.</p><p>I have come to realise that I do not have a fear of failure but, rather, a fear of success. I feel like I hold myself back because I like routine and I don’t like doing anything that takes me out of my comfort zone. I think this is why I never really lose weight. I put on about 3 stone over the last couple of years but have got back down to the weight I was before lockdown was a regularly used word in our vocabularies but I know I won’t lose any more unless I change my mindset. I tend to keep myself at a particular weight and never really deviate from that. I think this is because, if I lose weight, more opportunities will open up to me because I will feel happier in my own skin and not so fat and unattractive. I don’t really like travelling far from my flat and avoid doing anything out of the ordinary that I have no control over. I think this is why I feel I am stagnating, because I have visions and ideas to do new things but that annoying little voice in my head tells me to get over myself and stop thinking I deserve anything more than I have. THIS is the thing that needs work in 2023!</p><p>So that’s where I am, going into 2023. I hope you have all had a good 2022 or if you haven’t you are looking forward to the implied clean slate we all get going into the new year. I am determined to bother you with more posts in 2023 than I produced in 2022 but I promise to write some lighter, happier drivel in the coming weeks as I think we all need cheering up, especially me!</p><p>Feel free to comment or start a discussion below or on my Incompetent Soprano Facebook page. In the meantime, Merry Christmas and have this:</p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen="" class="BLOG_video_class" height="266" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/H5LaLLnhSKU" width="320" youtube-src-id="H5LaLLnhSKU"></iframe></div><br /><p><br /></p><p><br /></p>Bouchehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11174056470461569566noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2099903414238447407.post-20027654773519065112022-10-02T12:42:00.000+00:002022-10-02T12:42:09.608+00:00Blowing my own trumpet....not my favourite thing to do!<p>I must apologise for not posting as regularly as I had promised. A lot has happened over the last few weeks. I went back to the teaching day job, the Queen passed and I got Covid so it was all a bit much and I didn't feel like doing anything. Of course some of you will be thrilled to not be bothered by me for so long, unfortunately for you I am back to be my normal bothersome self again!</p><p>Having said that, I can't seem to shake my tiredness. I am writing this on my day off and it is all I can do to keep my eyes open at 1.30 in the afternoon! A nanna nap might be the ticket right now but not until I've finished this!</p><p>I think I mentioned this in a previous post, for the past 11 weeks I have been taking part in a challenge set by The Sing Space. Every week they choose a musical genre and give us 2 songs to choose from. We then record and upload one song to the challenge Facebook group. It's a way of updating your repertoire folder with specially cut versions of songs you could use whatever genre of musical/show/audition is required. There are 12 videos in total. Next week is the final week, Disney villains! I'm hoping for a bit of Ursula but we'll see.</p><p>I decided to take part because I have very few places or opportunities to sing for myself anymore. I have posted the videos to my Instagram <a href="https://www.instagram.com/incompetentsoprano/" target="_blank">@incompetentsoprano</a> and I am also in the process of adding them to my YouTube channel. If you'd like to follow my YouTube channel just click <a href="https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCBDk382O1f1zYhs40mRRYgg" target="_blank">here</a> and subscribe.</p><p>In the meantime here is the first of my 16 Bar Challenge videos for your perusal. They aren't in the order I recorded them but thought I'd start with one of my faves, Before The Parade Passes By from Hello Dolly. Enjoy and come and follow me on <a href="https://www.instagram.com/incompetentsoprano/" target="_blank">Instagram</a> and <a href="https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCBDk382O1f1zYhs40mRRYgg" target="_blank">YouTube</a>!</p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen="" class="BLOG_video_class" height="266" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/JmV5ZICVgAc" width="320" youtube-src-id="JmV5ZICVgAc"></iframe></div><br /><p><br /></p>Bouchehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11174056470461569566noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2099903414238447407.post-24428739609625857872022-08-30T09:05:00.013+00:002022-08-30T09:07:33.589+00:00Positive self affirmations? Shmositive shelf shaffirmations....you get the idea.<p>Last week we talked about owning your voice (I'm actually doing a little workshop on Wednesday 31st August, 12pm in The Enlightened Singer on Facebook on this subject if you fancy joining us. Click <a href="https://www.facebook.com/groups/183601153509924" target="_blank">here</a> to go join the group) but I have been thinking a bit about self esteem in general this week.</p><p>So, I have always, well in the past, had pretty low self esteem. I used to think I was a pretty horrible person, not sure why, but I did. However, not sure what happened recently but I now think I'm OK. I'm not a horrible person. I'm friendly, I'm supportive, I'm.... can't think of anything else without this turning into some sort of positive affirmation post.</p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh1m44MTLSvtDKYqbxCW-8Dc-kAxPU03PnN5mDZLfk6qkDYys-yDHrIxkWdO0WtFrcJDZgrWGcWg8oyTVqc6ZHkjinWSqYFeDaUer5nA5qUfu_9egn7lB19KWvUJf3gF_D-1TkfWAjJ2aS_FjdV2YjR18bJjvilF0XenUqR3X2on1kO8UR_apZMbj3_2A/s940/Untitled%20design.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="788" data-original-width="940" height="268" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh1m44MTLSvtDKYqbxCW-8Dc-kAxPU03PnN5mDZLfk6qkDYys-yDHrIxkWdO0WtFrcJDZgrWGcWg8oyTVqc6ZHkjinWSqYFeDaUer5nA5qUfu_9egn7lB19KWvUJf3gF_D-1TkfWAjJ2aS_FjdV2YjR18bJjvilF0XenUqR3X2on1kO8UR_apZMbj3_2A/s320/Untitled%20design.png" width="320" /></a></div><br /><p style="text-align: center;"><br /></p><p>It's not one of those posts, don't worry. If you follow my Facebook page you will have seen I have been posting more than usual. Live videos and some videos of me singing for a challenge I'm doing with The Sing Space at the moment. For some reason I've been feeling a little more content recently. Perhaps it's because I'm on my summer break (although that is over in 6 days 😢) and I've had more time to do whatever I want. Anyway, this feeling of contentment has lead me to a boost in self confidence and I decided to share my challenge videos with you lovely lot on the Incompetent Soprano Facebook and Instagram pages. </p><p>Of course I can't help thinking people will think I'm being self indulgent and blowing my own trumpet but, the simple fact is, my pages are my pages and if someone doesn't like it, or me, they can choose not to follow me anymore. We really shouldn't chase likes and follows on social media. It all means nothing really. It's not real, nobody really shows their true selves on social media. We all try to make out we have wonderful, perfect lives when the reality is, often, far from wonderful and perfect. </p><p>As I said though, I'm feeling pretty content and am also feeling like I don't mind so much what anybody thinks about me. I'm sure this feeling will change and evolve and I will have days where the whole world is against me but I think it's important to note things like this when we're feeling content and confident. I'm going to post what I want, when I want on my social media and I don't care if everyone tuts and rolls their eyes, it's my social media profile to do with what I want!</p>Bouchehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11174056470461569566noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2099903414238447407.post-87152824904018102722022-08-23T19:38:00.001+00:002022-08-23T19:38:17.838+00:00In the immortal words of Lady Gaga, "Baby I was born this way!"<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg7RsxoVpanF5p6RAk3uh6zsKVhzTeN7Xmz3WeCmjcU-CDiXzeVXeLQ9tQpHTA2mOH1mbRUL9l473EQ5zpYBVcbaDdnv-3eirR7JaO44WER0u4Ot3Dcqk6wfgayGo-9LJjWKQXD_WZkTnHK8ikkX3jnA4xbq0boz1moWfW7NaOIU189UByAP93uYHR7Lg/s940/Sing%20Like%20No%20One%20Is%20Listening.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="788" data-original-width="940" height="268" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg7RsxoVpanF5p6RAk3uh6zsKVhzTeN7Xmz3WeCmjcU-CDiXzeVXeLQ9tQpHTA2mOH1mbRUL9l473EQ5zpYBVcbaDdnv-3eirR7JaO44WER0u4Ot3Dcqk6wfgayGo-9LJjWKQXD_WZkTnHK8ikkX3jnA4xbq0boz1moWfW7NaOIU189UByAP93uYHR7Lg/s320/Sing%20Like%20No%20One%20Is%20Listening.png" width="320" /></a></div><p>This is a sneak preview of a post I wrote for The Enlightened Singer. Further down this post you will find details of how to join the private Facebook group. Come and join us!</p><p>Although I still do try to do my own singing I spend most of my life these days helping others find their voice. This is through private singing lessons, group lessons and through my work with my 4 choirs (yes, somehow I now run 4 choirs). One thing I find, from the people I teach is, almost everyone wants something they don't have.</p><p>I include myself in this. Some people want to be able to sing higher, some lower, some more sweetly, some more belty etc... However, over my many, many years of singing I have learnt to love the voice I have and work with what I've got. Of course I always strive for more but I know my strengths and I know my weaknesses. The sooner you accept the voice you have the easier it is to start improving it as you won't then be chasing a voice you can NEVER have.</p><p>Of course this doesn't mean we give up on our "dreams" it just means with acceptance comes clarity (sorry, didn't mean to make up an inspirational quote there). Once we are clear as to the kind of voice we have, and what it is capable of, we can work on making the changes that are possible for our individual sound, if we actually need to make changes.</p><p>This doesn't mean we don't need singing teachers and coaches, we do. Another pair of ears listening to us is very important as the sound we hear in our own ears/head is not the sound everyone else hears. A singing teacher or vocal coach can help you realise that the way we feel when we sing is as, if not more, important as how it sounds to us.</p><p>A big thing I find when listening to the singers I teach is many do not realise that we sing with more than just our larynx. In order to make the best sound we can our whole body needs to get involved. With this in mind many things can be "fixed" with our voices by working on our breathing. We will cover this in a bit more detail in a later blog post. </p><p>For now I have a little task for you. I want you to pick a song. It can be anything but needs to be something you know really well, Happy Birthday would suffice. I want you to close your eyes and hum it but I want you to take your time over every phrase, no rushing! How does the sound feel in your body? Try not to think about the sound just enjoy the sensations. That is all you have to do to start with. There will be an accompanying video to go with this so don't worry if this sounds like gobbledegook right now.</p><p>In order to see the aforementioned video go to <a href="https://www.facebook.com/groups/183601153509924" target="_blank">The Enlightened Singer</a> on Facebook and join the group so you can join me live on Wednesday 31st August (I'll let you know the time a couple of days before). I hope you don't mind me digressing from the usual type of post I put on here but they do say, variety is the spice of life! </p><p><br /></p>Bouchehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11174056470461569566noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2099903414238447407.post-23232880852725094372022-08-16T05:30:00.010+00:002022-08-16T05:30:00.174+00:00Are you sitting comfortably? Then I will begin....<p style="text-align: center;"></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEi9mbRAX9vydAEFyCAgCa4r68B8s9GfjxK7n6ls0yZPQlER4yFZQqHd72C6aeIOoqllarXHmyINdjouVedYEjOLXtn1-H0lrY1GbnSI6hlD9e17ESd6JMNCzYLwtD0ib85X1fLLs7m3bhlWXLffQWCCZnvvheUVmDiKktBK8m-MzgzdkawOrhWxNj5_DQ" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="1725" data-original-width="2284" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEi9mbRAX9vydAEFyCAgCa4r68B8s9GfjxK7n6ls0yZPQlER4yFZQqHd72C6aeIOoqllarXHmyINdjouVedYEjOLXtn1-H0lrY1GbnSI6hlD9e17ESd6JMNCzYLwtD0ib85X1fLLs7m3bhlWXLffQWCCZnvvheUVmDiKktBK8m-MzgzdkawOrhWxNj5_DQ" width="318" /></a></div><p></p><p>At the moment I am trying to build a new Facebook group called The Enlightened Singer (I think I've mentioned it before) and tomorrow there is a new blog post due out all about getting out of your comfort zone. This is not a carbon copy of that blog post so you could still read the other blog as well and I won't just be repeating myself, I promise!</p><p>I have been thinking about my comfort zone quite a lot recently. I don't push myself out of it very often. I am a big fan of routine and could really do with changing things up a little. I touched on this last week when talking about Olivia Newton John and how, in the words of Stephen King in The Shawshank Redemption, we should "get busy living or get busy dying" or words to that effect.</p><p>I don't think there is anything wrong with being comfortable but it could lead to a rather mundane and boring life if you're not careful. It's difficult to learn new things/skills as we get older. Our brains are not the sponges they were when we were children BUT that is not a reason not to try new experiences or walk down a different path once in a while.</p><p>I am really trying to curb my Netflix/Amazon/SkyGo addiction so that I can spend my free time doing something more practical and interesting rather than just watching box sets about unreal life and, for the most part, depressing myself. I just finished watching the entire 4 seasons of The Handmaid's Tale and I haven't been as depressed about the state of the world since I read George Orwell's 1984 but both are not real! They may turn out to be more real than we think and yes, there are elements pertinent to the world and they do, in some part, reflect life as we know it right now but there is no reason for me to get depressed thinking that I will end up like any of the people in those stories.</p><p>But I digress, a few years ago I read a book called The Artist's Way by Julia Cameron. On the front cover it is described as "A course in discovering and recovering your creative self". There are many tasks you have to undertake along with daily journaling. One other thing she suggests is an "artist date". This is time you put aside for yourself every week aimed at nurturing your creative consciousness and your inner artist (whatever artist means to you - painter, writer, singer, dancer, actor etc...). So this could be a trip to a museum, a trip to the theatre/cinema, a dance class, a cookery class, anything that gives your inner artist a bit of inspiration or satisfaction. You go on this "date" alone. You don't take anyone but yourself with you and you just absorb something new. I used to do this religiously but haven't for quite a while now so I'm thinking it might be time to reintroduce this into my schedule.</p><p>Why don't you (as the old TV programme used to tell those of us of a certain age) just turn off your television set and go out and do something less boring instead! Take yourself out on an "artist's date". Do something different, something you don't often do, something you've never done or something you've been meaning to do. Something that might just push you ever so slightly out of your comfort zone. </p><p>Why not let us know what you did by commenting on the post or on the Incompetent Soprano page on Facebook. Your activity might just inspire someone else and, as the toddlers say, sharing is caring!</p><p><br /></p><p>PS If you want to join The Enlightened Singer just click <a href="https://www.facebook.com/groups/183601153509924" target="_blank">here</a>.</p>Bouchehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11174056470461569566noreply@blogger.com0Croydon, UK51.3769529 -0.095689525.838800749980948 -35.2519395 76.915105050019051 35.0605605tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2099903414238447407.post-36152103332574462152022-08-10T20:05:00.003+00:002022-08-10T20:05:49.131+00:00Life is short and I'll miss you Olivia!<p>So this year is shaping up to be a repeat of 2016. In 2016 we lost Victoria Wood, George Michael, Alan Rickman, David Bowie and Prince to name but a few. So far in 2022 we have lost the likes of Barry Cryer, Leonard Fenton (Doctor Legg from Eastenders), Lynda Baron, June Brown, Bernard Cribbins and Nichelle Nichols. On Monday Olivia Newton-John was a sad addition to this years list. This is not meant to be a sad post (although I am VERY sad about Olivia), it just got me thinking about how much time I waste doing meaningless things such as binge watching box sets on Netflix and eating far too much all day, every day. Something really needs to change before it's too late.</p><p>Don't get me wrong, binge watching box sets on Netflix should not be forbidden BUT it should not be an everyday occurrence and I would love to live by the mantra "Eat to live, don't live to eat". I had already been trying to do something about the amount of time I waste and the amount of food I eat but the news of Olivia Newton-John's passing has caused me to strengthen my resolve and double down on making something more of my life!</p><p>To be fair I don't want much out of life. I would like to be happy (I am, but I think I could be happier), I would like to be more tolerant (of all sorts of people and things), I would like to encourage more ladies to join my four choirs because singing is good for the soul, but one thing a definitely want to do is have no regrets about my own singing. </p><p>I stopped performing professionally back in 2015. I didn't intend for Oliver! in Frinton-on-Sea to be my last show but, thus far, this is the case. I am not too sad about this being the last full length musical I ever do as it was one of my favourite jobs (Jerry Springer: The Opera was my absolute fave!) but I don't want to stop singing, for myself, all together. I still sing when teaching the choirs their songs but this is not the same as getting up and singing for an audience. </p><p>Funnily enough I had only been talking about planning new cabarets with a couple of friends earlier today so the news we got today telling us that Sandy from Grease and Kira from Xanadu (my personal favourite ONJ film!) had died has made me think deeply about the fact that life really is very short and should be grabbed with both hands before it's too late.</p><p>So, I intend to live as positively as I possibly can and spend more time doing the things I enjoy doing the most (singing) and not spend every bit of spare time I have binge watching nonsense and eating reconstituted potato snacks that are no good for me. This is going to be hard but, I am now ever so determined!</p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://images.hgmsites.net/lrg/john-travolta-and-olivia-newton-john-in-grease_100400608_l.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="350" data-original-width="800" height="175" src="https://images.hgmsites.net/lrg/john-travolta-and-olivia-newton-john-in-grease_100400608_l.jpg" width="400" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen="" class="BLOG_video_class" height="266" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/J3_uO5Fa8Oo" width="320" youtube-src-id="J3_uO5Fa8Oo"></iframe></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Magic - Olivia Newton John</div><br /><p style="text-align: center;"><br /></p>Bouchehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11174056470461569566noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2099903414238447407.post-62636242092367453312022-08-03T18:40:00.001+00:002022-08-03T18:40:29.494+00:00Consistency: the mother of productivity......or summat like that.<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEheOME0Zud1lhPsJuk4DZLVIbwAEfg3sNEq9MHmIeZS22taieXEAm9Tm1rG0Ns5-9jQuPMSrgZs-Jhfo753TrB6iw6JK3DxNgscnplYzyNwRkZUzw0nHxU2qT-3LOCDn4OYQ0aYiDRPKsSxPUuBGaLnFJIMmtsl0FFu9yAOQQQfuURwk_KT45XJUjF-6w/s1080/Stay%20Consistent.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1080" data-original-width="1080" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEheOME0Zud1lhPsJuk4DZLVIbwAEfg3sNEq9MHmIeZS22taieXEAm9Tm1rG0Ns5-9jQuPMSrgZs-Jhfo753TrB6iw6JK3DxNgscnplYzyNwRkZUzw0nHxU2qT-3LOCDn4OYQ0aYiDRPKsSxPUuBGaLnFJIMmtsl0FFu9yAOQQQfuURwk_KT45XJUjF-6w/s320/Stay%20Consistent.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><p style="text-align: justify;"><span style="text-align: left;">So, as you know, if you follow me in any way, I have not been particularly consistent when it comes to writing this, or any other, blog. The more I think about it, the more I think the lovely lady who got in touch to suggest I may have adult ADHD may have been on to something. Don't worry, that's not what I'm going to talk about as I don't know anything about it and can only talk about what I do know about.</span></p><p style="text-align: justify;">I have many irons in many fires at the moment. I run 4 choirs a week during term time, teach for a local dance school 3 days a week, teach privately 2 days a week and I'm trying to start producing online courses. This has led to some incredible overwhelm, procrastination and some daily watching of Friends (from the very beginning). Thankfully, right now, I am on my Summer break so it is not the end of the world to sit around doing nothing for a while but I have a long, LONG to do list that isn't getting any smaller.</p><p style="text-align: justify;">I may have mentioned before that I am obsessed with webinars and doing free challenges on Facebook, well, one challenge I wanted to start today was a Go Live for 21 Days challenge but I have managed to talk myself out of it. How and why have I done this I hear you ask!</p><p style="text-align: justify;">Firstly, why would ANYONE want to listen to me? I know I have very little in the way of self esteem so this isn't really a ridiculous question, however, let's turn that around, why WOULDN'T anyone want to listen to me? There will undoubtedly be some people who think I'm a bit of a knob, unfunny and boring BUT, and that BUT deserves the capital letters methinks, who cares if there are some who feel that way? You can not be all things to all people so I should really stop worrying and just do it.</p><p style="text-align: justify;">In an effort to try and get used to recording lives on Facebook I set up my very own private Facebook group to practice in. It wasn't my idea, I have heard this suggested by a few online coaches as a way of getting used to filming yourself. I have done quite a bit of self taping in the past couple of years but recently I have had these raging doubts and worries that people will think I'm ridiculous. Or rather, more ridiculous than before.</p><p style="text-align: justify;">As a woman on her own, of a certain age, I am very conscious of having to make some extra cash in order to have a slightly more financially secure future. Unfortunately one particular coach whose webinars I watch religiously says that we should not chase goals from a place of scarcity but from abundance. I still don't know how to do this but I am trying! What I am thinking, though, is if I can work on my consistency when it comes to posting in all my Facebook groups, Instagram accounts, Twitter et al perhaps I can grow my audiences and get a little closer to the financial stability I crave. In order to do this I need to get over myself and make sure I put myself in front on the right people, the people who will appreciate and want to hear what I have to say. To be fair, that includes you! Surely you wouldn't be here if you didn't want to hear what I have to say. Would you?</p><p style="text-align: justify;">So, prepare for some consistency people! I am going to start the Go Live for 21 Days in about 5 minutes but don't worry, the 21 lives will not all be on my Incompetent Soprano Facebook page. I will spread the joy to my Songsations and Enlightened Singer pages as well. I wouldn't want to make a nuisance of myself! Perhaps if any of you are feeling anything remotely similar you could try embracing consistency as well. Let me know how you get on.</p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgW-NRHH5WuJcc397Y3ERNkny6gwS5ci2h3E1Nia7g9LFQkreflZ1q0HODXB8I_mljddcYzw0bk2wYE-fuS4XYD68E8_7AbVXsjHOs0ECdfLm05PiQYHkX8klLgYIujEsKtFI_hJaISZci7DrfgV9tWBPTrSG8i70eTKXjJ4TRhS2CTovKXDvICEsgroA/s2048/Pigtails%202.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="2048" data-original-width="1536" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgW-NRHH5WuJcc397Y3ERNkny6gwS5ci2h3E1Nia7g9LFQkreflZ1q0HODXB8I_mljddcYzw0bk2wYE-fuS4XYD68E8_7AbVXsjHOs0ECdfLm05PiQYHkX8klLgYIujEsKtFI_hJaISZci7DrfgV9tWBPTrSG8i70eTKXjJ4TRhS2CTovKXDvICEsgroA/s320/Pigtails%202.jpeg" width="240" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Just had to take a little unfiltered pic of my pigtails. </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Has nothing to do with this post!</div><br /><p style="text-align: center;"><br /></p>Bouchehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11174056470461569566noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2099903414238447407.post-16296817853901046142022-06-27T13:24:00.004+00:002022-06-27T13:31:30.207+00:00A change is as good as a rest......umm no, a rest is much better!<p>I realise I have not been particularly prolific on here of late and I think this is for a number of reasons. Or rather, it could be for one of many reasons but I can't work out which. </p><p>We are approaching the end of another school year. I have no children but all of my business endeavours revolve around the school timetable. This means I am constantly waiting for the school holidays so that I can do nothing for a week or two (or six in the summer). I don't really like this feeling, I would love to have a little more freedom.</p><p>My fatigue is a little out of hand right now and I have a very busy 3 weeks ahead which is quite daunting. I've talked about my loss of mojo before and I have, recently (or for the past 3 years or so) put this down to being perimenopausal but I'm not so sure anymore. One of you lovely readers got in touch to ask if I thought I may have ADHD. I shrugged this off, thinking it seems very fashionable for adults to suddenly be diagnosed with ADHD and so I didn't really take this suggestion seriously. I can't be bothered to do anything about this (which I have read is a classic ADHD symptom) and really want to try and locate my mojo without medical intervention. </p><p>Of course this means that I am probably going to procrastinate like crazy and do nothing for 3 weeks until I am finally on my summer break but this is probably precisely what I shouldn't do. Therefore, in an effort to find a little more energy I have decided to make one small change that I am hoping will help.</p><p>During lockdown I had got myself into the habit of going for a daily walk, as we couldn't really do much else and then, once we were allowed to go everywhere again, I went nowhere! So I have reintroduced the daily walk. I have set myself a goal of, at least, 5000 steps per day and I have everything crossed that I will see a change in my energy levels because of it. I know I need to do more than this and perhaps I should be seeing a doctor to check all is well but I've never liked making a fuss about stuff so don't want to waste anyone's time.</p><p>Hopefully I will have something more interesting to tell you next time I write as I am getting completely bored with myself so can only imagine how you feel reading this. In the meantime take care of yourselves and I'll be in touch again soon!</p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiJmvnejVzkrfy1nW6d1PRv1wy3iF8BWAMXzAsjsAAd7AKT8CvD5xtdaY8X9xX6tjpieM0bpNQdUFOB4Ozte-sh3u0bNFbE8x_luXMNO_Apgrztye37GvRHnHL-PB3VyY-JhdUgVeyYQcSVVfs3CML01o3xgZJE_1SS2RHq4XNopDAE2Uf_itbxRPYIyg/s1080/tired%20woman%20with%20cat%20on%20the%20sofa%20Illustration%20Instagram%20posts.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1080" data-original-width="1080" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiJmvnejVzkrfy1nW6d1PRv1wy3iF8BWAMXzAsjsAAd7AKT8CvD5xtdaY8X9xX6tjpieM0bpNQdUFOB4Ozte-sh3u0bNFbE8x_luXMNO_Apgrztye37GvRHnHL-PB3VyY-JhdUgVeyYQcSVVfs3CML01o3xgZJE_1SS2RHq4XNopDAE2Uf_itbxRPYIyg/s320/tired%20woman%20with%20cat%20on%20the%20sofa%20Illustration%20Instagram%20posts.png" width="320" /></a></div><br /><p style="text-align: center;"><br /></p>Bouchehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11174056470461569566noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2099903414238447407.post-77020983239030062162021-12-05T19:30:00.000+00:002021-12-05T19:30:00.369+00:00To bitch or not to bitch?....best not actually.<p>Just a quick one today. Has anyone else noticed that Facebook has been bombarding us with "memories" recently? Well I have. Whilst I enjoy looking back on things I have absolutely no recollection of doing or saying, it just makes me realise how shocking my actual memory is. However, sometimes things like this have a way of holding a mirror up to our lives.</p><p>Oh my goodness I was bitchy in my 30s, probably in my 20s too but Facebook wasn't a thing then. A series of memories came up in which I talked of Katherine Jenkins in a less than complimentary manner. This got me to thinking about how angry and unsettled I was in my 20s/30s and how chilled I am now in comparison. In these days of "be kind" I would not dream of slagging off another singer/woman in the way I did back in the day.</p><p>Although she will never be my favourite she seems to have found her lane, a lane that I would never occupy as we are, and have always been, very different people/singers so there is no reason, and never was, for jealousy or dislike, if that's what it was. </p><p>But what WAS the actual reason for such an irrational hatred of one person trying to make the most of their life? To be honest I don't really know. I was pretty successful in my 30s, not Katherine Jenkins successful but I went from singing job to singing job and had a great time. I made wonderful, lifelong friends and got to sing some pretty awesome music. </p><p>I suppose it is human nature to compare ourselves to other human beings, although I don't think I do that so much anymore. I just seem to be in a constant battle with myself nowadays. I see all of those inspirational quotes ending with "you are enough" but I rarely believe it. Now and again I do but not all the time. Don't feel sorry for me, I reckon my 50s will be my decade of acceptance so watch out, you have 2 and a half years to get ready for this Incompetent Soprano's attempt at world domination. Until then you'll find me on the sofa, planning!</p>Bouchehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11174056470461569566noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2099903414238447407.post-28074756231229897352021-08-18T10:40:00.024+00:002021-08-18T10:53:51.255+00:00Starting here, starting now!Well, for a change, I did what I said I would do. You may, or may not, remember I said I was working on a new song in my last post (click <a href="http://www.incompetentsoprano.com/2021/07/shall-we-just-get-on-with-it-now.html" target="_blank">here</a> to read it if you missed it). So I learnt the song and I recorded the song and now I'm on the hunt for more songs.<div><br /></div><div>It's not perfect but I thought a work in progress type video would be good enough for now. It still needs a bit more work but it shows me, as well as everyone else, that it is worth working on. It has been a while since I have wanted to learn a new song so I am hoping this is the start of a trend.</div><div><br /></div><div>I have a working title for a new cabaret set, "Boys, Boys, Boys" (like the Sabrina song from the 80s) and I have been putting together a list of possible songs. I don't know if I will ever find a home for this new set but if I can get my act together (pun intended) I might actually manage to put myself out there before the end of the year. </div><div><br /></div><div>Having said that, things are busy at Claire Platt - Singing Teacher HQ and Songsations HQ so I have to work out how to use my time economically so I still have time for my own stuff. I have started scheduling my time a little better already. I teach for a dance school and those times are set in stone so I have tried to set aside certain times for my private singing lessons rather than working around other people's schedules. This means I can also schedule time every week to work on Boys, Boys, Boys (pun also intended). Fingers crossed this all works. </div><div><br /></div><div>I have never been particularly good at using my time efficiently. I am a fly by the seats of my pants kind of girl. All my essays at university were done the night before they were due in. Except one that I worked really hard on over a couple of weeks and got an A for. It's just a shame I didn't learn from that! I am determined to use all of my time productively from now on. Of course I also need to schedule time for watching shit on Netflix. That's very important.</div><div><br /></div><div>So if you want to have a gander at what I've been up to, the video is below (if the video doesn't show up click the link instead). <a href="https://youtu.be/4TSQjtcqJ-g" target="_blank">https://youtu.be/4TSQjtcqJ-g</a></div><div><br /></div><br /><div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen="" class="BLOG_video_class" height="297" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/4TSQjtcqJ-g" width="533" youtube-src-id="4TSQjtcqJ-g"></iframe></div><br /></div>Bouchehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11174056470461569566noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2099903414238447407.post-71812107543686392382021-07-31T17:05:00.003+00:002021-08-01T14:08:32.475+00:00Shall we just get on with it now?<p>Well, well, well it's the summer holidays so everything gets a little more manageable for a few weeks but, as always, I am plagued by procrastination. Well I say that, I watched a webinar (standard) that included some techniques to get over the procrastination thing. Funnily enough I had already decided that I was going to split my to-do list up into smaller chunks in order to be able to tick more things off which is one of the techniques. It always feels good to tick things off a to-do list.</p><p>Changing the subject very abruptly, Facebook has been throwing up more "memories" than it ever used to recently. Has anyone else noticed that? Anyway, last week I was reminded about the very first cabaret set I did at The Pheasantry in Chelsea back in 2014. It was, by a country mile, the best thing I had ever done on a stage (possibly off-stage too) and really made me re-evaluate what I'm doing with my worklife.</p><p>I know I have a little more time as I gave up one of my regular jobs. I originally gave this job up in order to give more time to my choir, Songsations, but my thoughts have changed where that is concerned as well. The choir is going to be a fun project. Great if it brings in a few pennies but I think it's time to try and start making a living doing what I actually trained to do and go back to performing.</p><p>I know I don't want to do big shows like Phantom again but I definitely want to sing again, on a stage, in front of people. It will take a bit of time to get things organised but I have started putting things together for a new cabaret set PLUS I have started to learn a new song. A song that I will sing AND play the piano for. I am still a dreadful pianist but I am far better than I was before I started teaching singing. I will record the new song for you, not when it's perfect (as I have learnt perfection is unattainable) but when I can get through it without making too many mistakes.</p><p>One thing I do find, now that I'm a bit older, is that I have a brain like a sieve. I can't remember lyrics nearly as well as I could BUT the good thing about doing cabaret rather than musicals is it really doesn't matter if I go wrong so the pressure is less when contemplating putting a cabaret together. </p><p>For the first time in a very, very long time I am excited about MY singing again. I don't feel the need to live vicariously through my students anymore as I AM going to do something about it and put myself out there again!</p><p>In the meantime, here's a little reminder, for you and for me, of what I CAN do (Ooh there might be one sweary word in this!). <a href="https://youtu.be/kNxVT78E3mU">If you can't see the video below, click here!</a></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen="" class="BLOG_video_class" height="266" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/kNxVT78E3mU" width="412" youtube-src-id="kNxVT78E3mU"></iframe></div><br /><p style="text-align: center;"><br /></p><br /><p><br /></p>Bouchehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11174056470461569566noreply@blogger.com0United Kingdom55.378051 -3.43597333.505111484292605 -38.592222999999983 77.2509905157074 31.720276999999985tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2099903414238447407.post-11568805462280502292021-06-15T10:56:00.002+00:002021-06-15T11:03:17.869+00:00Let's mix things up a bit.<p>Just a quick post with a bit of info, particularly, for subscribers. Unfortunately the subscription service Google uses to allow you to subscribe to this blog and get your fix of the Incompetent Soprano without having to think about it (I rarely do) is closing down. Therefore if you wish to continue receiving these blog posts to your inbox please subscribe (or re-subscribe) via the link on the sidebar of the blog.</p><p>If you are receiving this via email you will need to visit my actual blog to subscribe. The Google subscription will cease to be a thing at the end of July.</p><p>If you choose to subscribe you will be subscribing to The Enlightened Singer which is an umbrella group for The Incompetent Singer, Sing Your Song and any other singing related emails you might be interested in. I will not bombard your inbox and you can unsubscribe at any point but you will receive all emails not just Incompetent Soprano emails.</p><p>I have had a rather "enlightened" couple of weeks actually so there is more stuff to come in the future. Therefore if you don't want to miss anything subscribe via the blog or visit and join the Facebook group by clicking the following link: <a href="https://www.facebook.com/groups/183601153509924">The Enlightened Singer Facebook Group</a></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-7ri_Xr-ovKA/YMiHSAz8LaI/AAAAAAAACmc/LLgZwm9Qv64ozqy8noovoFItNAtjN3UXwCNcBGAsYHQ/s500/The%2BEnlightened%2BSinger%2BLogo%2B1.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="500" data-original-width="500" height="320" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-7ri_Xr-ovKA/YMiHSAz8LaI/AAAAAAAACmc/LLgZwm9Qv64ozqy8noovoFItNAtjN3UXwCNcBGAsYHQ/s320/The%2BEnlightened%2BSinger%2BLogo%2B1.png" /></a></div><br /><p><br /></p>Bouchehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11174056470461569566noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2099903414238447407.post-71167394690207794742021-06-07T10:45:00.004+00:002021-06-07T10:45:54.332+00:00Accountability not acceptance<p>Ooh it's been a while hasn't it. This post is going to rake over old ground, I don't apologise for that, but you might want to give it a miss if you're fed up of reading what could be construed as negativity. There is a lot going on at the moment, some of which I can't talk about here as it's not my place (sorry to be mysterious), and I am still having a problem with motivation (no change there). I started a journaling challenge and it's already thrown up a few things that need to be addressed quite urgently. </p><p>I have done a lot of journaling in the past but haven't recently. I don't know if it really does anything helpful so could be a big old waste of my time. Having said that it can't be more of a waste of my time than all the Netflix binging I've been doing recently (Below Deck was a particular low point). I've talked quite a bit in the past about my laziness and inability to motivate myself to exercise. I have kept up my New Year's resolution to move for, at least, 10 minutes a day so that's good but I have realised that I have regained all the weight I lost when I joined a gym 8 years ago. I am back to square one and really don't think I can do it again.</p><p>I did do my 10,000 steps yesterday but I need to do that everyday and, to be honest, walking is not nearly enough. It's great but it does not cut it. I don't know why I'm avoiding. I sometimes wonder if I am comfortable in, what I see as, my chubby shell. Nobody pays me much attention in life and maybe that actually feels easier. I travel through life slightly under the radar. I rarely put my hand up to answer questions or join conversations. I sit on the sidelines. </p><p>I digress. Well I say that, I am not certain where I want to go with this post, I just know I want to write something. Perhaps it's an extension of the journaling thing. There are many ways to go about journaling but the way I tend to do it is to treat it more like a mind dump. I just write and don't stop for a couple of pages. I write everything down that comes to mind no matter how ridiculous or banal. It is not for someone else to read so it doesn't matter what you write. The idea is to dump all the crap that is in your head so that you have room to think about the things that matter or allow space for working on projects you have on the go.</p><p>The thing that is worrying me right now is that I just sit on my sofa thinking but not doing. This might be a weird thing to say but I am really not very intelligent and don't understand things like tax, GDPR, websites, technology. I love being self employed and love making my own work but there are SO many other aspects to running a business that I just don't understand and end up like an ostrich with my head buried in the sand. This is why I can't seem to grow my singing teacher business or my choirs.</p><p>I don't want to accept this as my life though. I want more, I want to be excited by the things I do in my life. Many of us are in the same boat and have lost our mojo because of this damn pandemic. In March 2020 I was just getting my head around things and the choirs, in particular, were getting bigger and I was getting more confident running them but Covid has decimated the choirs and, even now, as things are starting to open up again, my singers aren't coming back and I am not sure I can ever get it back to where it was. </p><p>I am taking part in a "Quantum Manifesting Challenge" this week and I am watching a webinar as I write this (I REALLY have to stop multitasking. This is the root of my problems I reckon). The woman running it has just asked, regarding your business, do you feel like you are swimming in soup, swimming in water or flying through the air? I am DEFINITELY swimming in very thick soup right now.</p><p>I know only I can change things. I have to stop thinking I can't do things or understand everything. I have always had trouble with waiting or standing still. I can NOT bear traffic jams. They freak me out. If I am reading a book I have to read it fast or I give up and I find it very hard to concentrate on one thing at a time. I have documents and books to read explaining all the things I don't think I can understand but I am constantly overwhelmed and can't bring myself to even start reading them. I have a pile of books on singing to read but I am too overwhelmed to start reading them. I am forever saying I haven't got time to do things and, instead of getting on with what I can get done, I go and sit on my sofa and stare into space for hours at a time.</p><p>I know it doesn't have to be like this. I am accountable and I do not have to accept that this is all life is. I really didn't know what I wanted this post to be when I started, but I feel like writing this might help me feel some accountability and might push me to do SOMETHING. Not everything but something. I think I will start with a walk.</p><p><br /></p><p>PS In the name of accountability I am sharing the photo below. This was taken on Sunday. I am 3 sizes bigger and 3 stones heavier than I was 2 years ago. I would love to post a photo in 6 months time that shows I have improved my fitness (I'll probably forget because of brain fog - that's the other problem right now). We'll see!</p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-Df9bE6pYlv4/YL32_6f_3eI/AAAAAAAACmU/hFeXHPjlrCwwNMR6nmgxkHZl3pd28nIRgCPcBGAYYCw/s1600/Selsdon%2B060621.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="936" height="320" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-Df9bE6pYlv4/YL32_6f_3eI/AAAAAAAACmU/hFeXHPjlrCwwNMR6nmgxkHZl3pd28nIRgCPcBGAYYCw/s320/Selsdon%2B060621.JPG" /></a></div><br /><p><br /></p><p><br /></p>Bouchehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11174056470461569566noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2099903414238447407.post-11885792142100103192021-03-09T11:38:00.003+00:002021-03-09T11:38:58.422+00:00Jack of all trades, master of none!It has been a rollercoaster of a week, I can tell you. Much as I hate those posts that tease the audience into wondering, what is going on, or coerce people into commenting, “you OK hun?” I can’t give you all the details about what happened to me this week but, do not fret, all is well now. I think.<div><br /></div><div>This "happening" caused me to think about what I am doing with my life right now. Don’t worry this isn’t one of those “I don’t know what I’m doing with my life” or “something has to change” posts. I have fingers in many pies right now but I’m struggling to work out the best path to travel down. I am consistently guilty of spreading myself too thin which means I can turn my hand to many things but don’t feel like I am the master (or mistress) of any of these things.</div><div><br /></div><div>So I'm not sure what my focus should be at the moment. I run a choir, <a href="http://www.songsations.net" target="_blank">Songsations</a>, I teach private singing lessons and write a blog about singing <a href="http://www.singyoursong.co.uk" target="_blank">Sing Your Song</a>, I have an Instagram page called <a href="https://www.instagram.com/60secondsinger/" target="_blank">The 60 Second Singer</a>, I teach for two theatre schools and I'm trying to write and set up some online courses. I haven't mastered any one of these things but I would love to be mistress of all of the things I have set up.</div><div><br /></div><div>What to do about this? Well, I am a very impatient person. I remember when I was about 8 years old becoming obsessed with reading and, in particular, reading quickly. I wasn't very good at taking my time with books. If I started a book I had to finish it ASAP. This is not the case now. I have about 6 books on the go right now and I doubt I will finish any of them any time soon. It's too much like hard work. I think this is why I like blogging and why I'll probably never write a book. I can write a blog post in an hour but a book would take weeks or months and I do not have the patience to do it. If I start something I want it finished.</div><div><br /></div><div>I think this is why I had trouble learning, or rather, retaining songs at college. I would learn songs very quickly, perform them and then immediately forget them. I also think this is why, when I have a to-do list as long as Beyonce's legs, I do none of it and binge watch something on Netflix instead (other streaming platforms are available) as I get too overwhelmed by the feeling I HAVE to do something. I am an excellent ostrich, constantly burying my head in the sand. To be honest I should be working now but I'd rather write this.</div><div><br /></div><div>Do I have a solution? Not really, no. I know it takes willpower and I need to build new habits. A few years ago I Marie Kondo'd my flat to within an inch of it's life and I ended up creating 2 specific habits from that experience. One is I always wash up my frying pan when I make my omelette for breakfast. Without fail. I NEVER leave it in the sink to "soak". The second is I always fold my socks and put them away in a certain way in my sock drawer. I'm OCD about this. So I know I am capable of building habits, I suppose I just have to do it.</div><div><br /></div><div>I am still a little obsessed with webinars and a watched a great one about forming habits the other day. I had planned to do everything the host suggested: getting up at 5am (never going to happen so I changed it to 6am), exercising for 20 minutes as soon as I got up, 20 minutes journaling every morning and 20 minutes of learning (all before breakfast) plus a couple of other things. I have managed none of this. </div><div><br /></div><div>What I should have done was take one of these ideas and run with just that for a while and slowly added the other elements. I think they say it takes something like 66 days to form a habit (I might have made up that number but it is another number if not that one) so if I had any patience whatsoever I would spend 66 days forming each habit like I did with the frying pan and my sock drawer. Perhaps I have answered my own question there. </div><div><br /></div><div>Another webinar I watched reminded me of the fact it takes 10000 hours of practise/learning to become an expert in something. This is why I am unlikely to be a master of anything. I have the concentration of a puppy so find practise or sitting down and concentrating on anything for longer than 5 minutes very difficult. One method that has been suggested to me is to set a timer for 20 minutes. Work for those 20 minutes and when the alarm goes off I can go and make a brew or do something else and then reset the alarm and do it again. It's an idea and sounds like a pretty doable idea actually. My problem is motivating myself to do this. I’m not going to blame Lockdown or the pandemic for this lack of motivation. I have always been like this. Perhaps I need to add a touch of meditation. Unfortunately I don’t have the patience which is ironic really.</div><div><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-kASz-aBrFDg/YEdbTt5jtyI/AAAAAAAAClE/osgYJ5RgqZ8vj-anmuKZhFMg_RUs-XYyACNcBGAsYHQ/s1199/A1C9C75C-4BC4-4E81-8E09-FF7A7E02745A.jpeg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1199" data-original-width="1199" height="320" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-kASz-aBrFDg/YEdbTt5jtyI/AAAAAAAAClE/osgYJ5RgqZ8vj-anmuKZhFMg_RUs-XYyACNcBGAsYHQ/s320/A1C9C75C-4BC4-4E81-8E09-FF7A7E02745A.jpeg" /></a></div><br /><div><br /></div><div>I realised today I have actually developed a new habit recently. At the beginning of the year I made the resolution to "move my body” for 10 minutes a day. It is now March 11th and I have been for a walk everyday (apart from 2 but I did other exercise at home on those days) which means, after 70 days, I am now in the realm of this being a habit now. This adds to my steadily growing belief that I do have some willpower, I just need to be able to hone it and direct it towards the things I really would like to achieve in the fairytale that is playing out in my imagination. </div><div><br /></div><div>So, I definitely have much to think about and I desperately want to feel like I have mastered something in life. I shall go and set my alarm for 6am tomorrow morning. I will probably turn it off and go back to sleep but, hey, it's a start innit!</div><div><div><br /></div></div>Bouchehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11174056470461569566noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2099903414238447407.post-9803957398210426932021-02-22T14:48:00.011+00:002021-02-22T14:58:13.869+00:00Oh for the tech skills of a 6 year old!<p>I’ve had a pretty good couple of weeks. Nothing of much note has actually happened but I’m feeling more positive and motivated right now. I even just hoovered my flat and put a load of washing on so things must be looking up. I put it down to the fact that I have been getting out for my self-prescribed 10 minutes of daily exercise. As I think I mentioned, I made a few resolutions at the beginning of January, one of which was exercise every day for at least 10 minutes. I have slowly got my step count up to an average of 7000 per day, helped by listening to podcasts whilst walking.</p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-LOC4GK6UQPc/YDPGKHJdiTI/AAAAAAAACko/ZoVluwUInTYVomqm3QHW7Vphmbf63AIVwCNcBGAsYHQ/s2048/Selsdon%2BPark%2BHotel.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1536" data-original-width="2048" height="300" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-LOC4GK6UQPc/YDPGKHJdiTI/AAAAAAAACko/ZoVluwUInTYVomqm3QHW7Vphmbf63AIVwCNcBGAsYHQ/w400-h300/Selsdon%2BPark%2BHotel.jpg" width="400" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Evidence I went for a walk!</div><p><br /></p><p>I’m not writing this to gloat, particularly as it’s really not worth gloating about, but the motivation thing has been a problem for me for years now so any glimmer of hope that I am coming out of a funk is worth talking about just for myself (I apologise that you have to endure a post about it though, I really do). </p><p>I still feel like I’m in limbo right now, as we are still in lockdown, and making big changes is probably not a great idea right now. However, I don’t think I need to make BIG changes anymore. Little changes to my mind set and getting up a little earlier in order to get more done will do for now methinks.</p><p>Don’t misunderstand, I still find myself sitting on my sofa staring into space for quite lengthy periods but I have noticed a definite increase in productivity. I mentioned my new venture <a href="https://www.instagram.com/60secondsinger/" target="_blank">The 60 Second Singer</a> on Instagram in my last post and I’ve already put out 6 videos. It could be construed as a bit of a vanity project but there are other reasons, other than showing off, I have for taking on this project.</p><p>Life has really changed in the past 20 years and the need for being somewhat tech savvy has grown exponentially. I’m not a total dunce when it comes to technology but my 6 year nephew probably knows more than I do. The reason I started <a href="https://www.instagram.com/60secondsinger/" target="_blank">The 60 Second Singer</a> was twofold really. I wanted to hone my skills in producing videos and I also wanted to get more comfortable in front of a camera.</p><p>I have wonky teeth that I have been hugely self conscious about since I was a teenager but, unfortunately, I also used to have a real, deep seated fear of the dentist. I stopped going to the dentist when I was 16 and was almost 30 before I finally plucked up the courage to go again. Although I would love to have my teeth “fixed” I don’t have the time, or the money, to do it so I figured the only thing I could do was to start putting myself out there in video form in order to get over my self-hatred of my gnashers and other bits.</p><p>I am OBSESSED by other people’s teeth. When I watch tv or films, anything on a screen, I spend ages studying the teeth I see on the screen and constantly compare myself to them. I never measure up. I could just about cope with my wonkiness until about two years ago when one of my front teeth shifted and became even wonkier. So now is the time to make myself get comfortable with them. </p><p>The videos I have been making are definitely helping but there’s a way to go yet. I just hope I can get better at them over time. So if you “follow” The 60 Second Singer please bear with me as I try to exceed the editing skills of my 6 year old nephew. The video below is from The 60 Second Singer so you can see what I've been up to, just don't look at my teeth!</p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen='allowfullscreen' webkitallowfullscreen='webkitallowfullscreen' mozallowfullscreen='mozallowfullscreen' width='320' height='266' src='https://www.blogger.com/video.g?token=AD6v5dz9NcQHq_j1kiF4LsurLhf9g3-99T6aKqoNqPGloGFOVEt_2RXON3XiAc8Hp0FabeDObfTZB9kVh7y4jjLNdA' class='b-hbp-video b-uploaded' frameborder='0'></iframe></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://www.instagram.com/p/CLRLMoepZ5P/" target="_blank">Click here to see the video on Instagram</a><br /></div><br /><p><br /></p>Bouchehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11174056470461569566noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2099903414238447407.post-10843305992566776672021-02-08T12:14:00.002+00:002021-02-08T12:14:26.988+00:00Burn (out), Baby Burn(out)!<p>I had started writing this post before Christmas as I was feeling a little like I couldn't cope anymore. Yet here we are in 2021 and I feel very different. </p><p>I had an interesting Christmas, on my own down South and as I said in my last post, <a href="http://www.incompetentsoprano.com/2021/01/let-it-snow-let-it-snow-let-it.html" target="_blank">Let It Snow, Let It Snow, Let It Snow</a> I quite enjoyed the peace and quiet. The 3 weeks or so I had to myself was invaluable but I am now feeling a little restless. I know we probably shouldn't make any big life changes right now but something has to change, I think.</p><p>I had been feeling overwhelmed and like I needed the world to stop (pretty sure I'm not alone there) but now I feel overwhelmed in a different way. My energy levels are up thanks to the daily walks but my head is spinning with ideas but I don't feel I have a way to see the ideas through to fruition.</p><p>Does anyone else feel like we have far too much time to think? I suppose that question is aimed at the other singletons really as those of you with families, I imagine, have PLENTY to keep you occupied right now. It might not be things you want to be occupied with but your brain space is occupied nonetheless. I am having trouble catching my thoughts at the moment. I have loads of ideas but the second I start working on one idea another idea muscles in and tries to take over the part of my brain that is trying to sort out the original idea. This ultimately ends with me giving up and binge-watching summat on Netflix (other streaming sites are available). </p><p>This is not a moaning post at all. It's more frustration. I have such friendly envy for all those people who are making things happen during this crazy time and just wish I could make things happen the way they do. I have started a couple of things but I am not able to get them out there so enough people see them. I have attended webinars galore on marketing and social media use but still can't seem to get the 1000 subscribers they say I should be able to get from watching their webinars. I'm not naive. I know watching a webinar isn't going to change things but it should be a start. Anyway, I'm sure something will click in to place eventually.</p><p>I'm not looking to be famous or a millionaire but I would like to pay my bills without worrying about how (wouldn't we all). But it's not even only about money, it's about feeling useful. I don't always feel useful. </p><p>Well, I'm going to wrap it up there and leave you with of a pic of me looking like a snowman during my walk yesterday. Oh and if you don't mind, could you visit my new Instagram venture, <a href="https://instagram.com/p/CK_j508pp0r/" target="_blank">The 60 Second Singer</a> and give the page a follow? I'll be posting videos with little singing tips, tricks, techniques not longer than 60 seconds, hence the name. I really want to build this one into something, not sure what, yet, but definitely something.</p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-cT8zgDf-M6k/YCEo1hByZXI/AAAAAAAACkQ/uEsC62Xcgqc1hbWDdd35U3zvqFihLNcrgCNcBGAsYHQ/s1600/7A2CAAF7-A226-4657-8E64-6C0228D9355E.jpeg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1200" height="320" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-cT8zgDf-M6k/YCEo1hByZXI/AAAAAAAACkQ/uEsC62Xcgqc1hbWDdd35U3zvqFihLNcrgCNcBGAsYHQ/s320/7A2CAAF7-A226-4657-8E64-6C0228D9355E.jpeg" /></a></div><br /><p><br /></p>Bouchehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11174056470461569566noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2099903414238447407.post-83302946632748553782021-01-25T16:07:00.004+00:002021-01-25T16:07:47.331+00:00Let It Snow, Let it Snow, Let It Snow......Please!<p>So, how are we all doing right now? Another year, another lockdown. I know some people are finding this one harder than the last two and there are a variety of reasons for this. I am not any kind of psychiatrist so I won't even begin to bore you with my thoughts. Your reasons for hating/loving lockdown are your own. I can only speak for myself.</p><p>Firstly, let's talk Christmas. Due to the change in tiers just before the holidays, I decided to stay put for Christmas and not venture up north to spend it with my family. I didn't hate it. I wouldn't want to spend Christmas alone every year but I actually might actively arrange to spend it alone again from time to time. It was nice to not have to travel here, there and everywhere during a holiday period for once. I had a couple of weeks to veg out on the sofa, eat chocolate and watch whatever I wanted, whenever I wanted, on the TV. This, of course, led us into lockdown 3.0 and a whole new way of being.</p><p>It's very strange not being able to do things when you want but it isn't a feeling I completely dislike. It makes you realise what you really think important and what you don't. For instance, as anyone who has ever read this diary will know, I LOVE a trip to Costa or Caffe Nero. BC (before Covid) I would visit a coffee shop 4 or 5 times a week, easily. I can now count on two hands the amount of times I have visited one since March last year and I can count on one hand the amount of times I have eaten in one. I have not missed it and don't intend to return to my old ways once this craziness is over.</p><p>What I have been doing, since this third lockdown began, is meet a friend for a socially distanced walk once a week in Selsdon. We go to an independent coffee shop, Planet of the Beans for the most excellent hot chocolate and then wander around the local golf course talking nonsense and getting our prescribed hour of exercise. Yesterday was Sunday and was the best day I've had in a long time. </p><p>Yesterday the snow came to South Croydon. Thick, heavy snow reminiscent of the Beast from the East last seen in 2018. Being a northerner I miss proper snow. My weather app had told me to expect snow so on Sunday morning, as I told the people who follow me on Facebook, I leapt out of bed with the enthusiasm of a small child but with the body of a middle aged woman and hobbled to the window. Hobbled because my ankles take a while to warm up in the morning nowadays. Alas at that point, 9am, there was no snow. I was due to meet my friend at 11am so I had everything crossed that the weather app wasn't lying to me. It wasn't and at 10am the thick snowflakes began to fall from the sky.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-HcNsUoy260Q/YA7kIAwMFGI/AAAAAAAACjQ/0V7eyZF8svEk81T3pX1lKLu3QFGf1geagCNcBGAsYHQ/s2048/IMG_1130.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1536" data-original-width="2048" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-HcNsUoy260Q/YA7kIAwMFGI/AAAAAAAACjQ/0V7eyZF8svEk81T3pX1lKLu3QFGf1geagCNcBGAsYHQ/s320/IMG_1130.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>My friend and I met as arranged and picked up our hot chocolates and walked, in the snow, to the golf course. The snow kept coming and created the most incredible winter wonderland.<p></p><p>The thing that made yesterday particularly special was the fact that I had time to go out and enjoy the snow the way I had when I was a child messing about in 3 feet of snow (we got about 2 inches yesterday but it felt like more). Had we not been in a lockdown it would not have even occurred to me to go and make the most of the weather.</p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-hqfVJZLzIvA/YA7kA-ezKZI/AAAAAAAACjM/B8Bv8DdRFwEqjltF__uEOjuPDxMkcwwxQCNcBGAsYHQ/s2048/IMG_1134.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="2048" data-original-width="1536" height="320" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-hqfVJZLzIvA/YA7kA-ezKZI/AAAAAAAACjM/B8Bv8DdRFwEqjltF__uEOjuPDxMkcwwxQCNcBGAsYHQ/s320/IMG_1134.jpg" /></a></div><div><br /></div>If being alive in these most crazy of times has taught me anything, it is that 'things' are unimportant. As they say, "you can't take it with you" and I believe I truly understand this now. Of course I would love to own my own little house and there are 'things' that would make life easier if I had them at my disposal but life is what you make of it not what you acquire along the way. <div><br /></div><div>The one thing I wish I could do during this lockdown is sing more for myself. I made a few simple resolutions at New Year and most I have stuck to, go for a walk everyday is one I have managed to achieve thus far. Another resolution was to sing for myself at least twice a week. Unfortunately I haven't managed this. I can't sing at home because my neighbour objects to my singing so that leaves my car as a possible place to practice but I haven't done so as yet. </div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div>I also thought about starting a little project whereby I record myself singing in my car and upload those recordings to YouTube. My walking friend and I had been trying to come up with a pithy name for this project. We thought of Car-aoke but Tesla use that already so I'm thinking I could call it Clair-eoke or In-Car-Tations or Petrol-Head-Voice. Unfortunately I haven't really felt like doing it so the name is irrelevant right now. If anyone can think of one, though, please let me know.</div><div><br /></div><div>Ooh, before I go, my friend took this picture of me yesterday during the snowstorm (btw the snow was almost completely gone three hours later). I asked him "Do I look like I'm in a catalogue?" "Yes", he replied, "Screwfix".</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-5gFJkD6O9TQ/YA7rEcNLv-I/AAAAAAAACjc/THXv609SzGY8TxJ3M4MWaqO_mYAXKJ1mQCNcBGAsYHQ/s1024/df4b01a8-c522-4509-b6bc-03aab8868a3c.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1024" data-original-width="768" height="320" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-5gFJkD6O9TQ/YA7rEcNLv-I/AAAAAAAACjc/THXv609SzGY8TxJ3M4MWaqO_mYAXKJ1mQCNcBGAsYHQ/s320/df4b01a8-c522-4509-b6bc-03aab8868a3c.jpg" /></a></div><br /><div><br /></div><div><br /><p><br /></p><p> </p></div>Bouchehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11174056470461569566noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2099903414238447407.post-7981267850528674182020-11-29T14:41:00.003+00:002020-11-30T14:49:21.543+00:00To Christmas tree or not to Christmas tree? <p>So, following my last post, my anxiety levels have reached an all-time high. Not because of the stupid woman at the Post Office in my last offering but because there is something wrong with my car. I don't really know why this has affected me in the way it has but I know I can't do my normal ostrich thing and bury my head in the sand this time. </p><p>I took the car to my local garage and they put my mind at rest that it was nothing that imminently needed seeing to but, as the car is still under warranty, I need to take it to a Dacia garage to get it fixed. Problem is I have NO time and the nearest place is a little further away than I'd like. Point is there is NOTHING I can do about it (apart from book it in at the garage) so there is NOTHING to be anxious about. So why can't I get a handle on it? To be fair to my brain, I think I am possibly more anxious because I am on my own and don't have anyone to really help me with these silly everyday things. I am perfectly capable of coping on my own (I've managed for 46 years) but these are strange times and life alone is something altogether different from how it was 9 months ago! This is not meant to diminish any anxiety any coupled up people are feeling by the way.</p><p>So why am I writing this? Well it has nothing to do with singing (my posts rarely do these days to be honest) but it does fuel my feelings of incompetence. As a result of my high anxiety I have watched many, many terrible things on Netflix (other streaming services are available) including five Christmas films in two days and it's not even December yet. Full disclosure, I have one on right now as I type. I love the formulaic nature of a typical Christmas film but it has also inspired me to start working on a new project. An actual, potential hobby if you will. </p><p>I may have said in the past, I may not but I'm not going to re-read all my posts to check, that I have always wanted an actual hobby. I'm not sure I have had a real hobby since I used to play with my Sindy's or my Fashion Plates set (if anyone finds one of these please get it for me!).</p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-zNAyHaJA0ds/X8OhJCQBZ5I/AAAAAAAACg4/kWo8qwJbSQs_kUQlcGa1jhdjL-uYm1s1QCNcBGAsYHQ/s1000/Fashion%2Bplates.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1000" data-original-width="1000" height="320" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-zNAyHaJA0ds/X8OhJCQBZ5I/AAAAAAAACg4/kWo8qwJbSQs_kUQlcGa1jhdjL-uYm1s1QCNcBGAsYHQ/s320/Fashion%2Bplates.jpg" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">However, I have always wanted to write a book but I have never felt I have the patience. A blog suits me as it takes me a couple of hours at most to write a post and then I'm done. Instant gratification. For me, not you! I have no aspirations to write a book for public consumption but I would love to have a pop at it. Anyway all these Christmas films have given me the best idea so I'm going to give it a go and try and write something longer than a blog post. The idea also means I have the best excuse to watch every Christmas film I can find. All in the name of research of course. I'm not going to divulge the idea I have had for this "book" and it is, in all probability, going to take me years to do. I have the beginnings of a treatment for a film in a drawer that I started about 10 years ago so I'm not optimistic that this book will ever get written before I shuffle off this mortal coil but if it gives me something else to think about other than singing and teaching I will be happy. </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">In other news I am very tempted to put up my Christmas tree today. I haven't had a Christmas tree for the past 3 or so years. Last year I did this:</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-HLZQhQgSL0U/X8OvXNr6OgI/AAAAAAAAChE/snHjcH8XcfoSvBL1b6r8dd-M9AG_neA8QCNcBGAsYHQ/s2048/IMG_0088.HEIC" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="2048" data-original-width="1536" height="320" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-HLZQhQgSL0U/X8OvXNr6OgI/AAAAAAAAChE/snHjcH8XcfoSvBL1b6r8dd-M9AG_neA8QCNcBGAsYHQ/s320/IMG_0088.HEIC" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">This is what passed for a Christmas tree in 2019. Not sure I can be bothered though, and it is not yet December but perhaps it would cheer me up. I'll decide when this Christmas film I'm watching has finished. Oh, and if you want a Christmas film recommendation, "Christmas Inheritance" on Netflix is fantastically trashy.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><b>UPDATE</b></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">Since I posted this I rang the garage and it turns out the warning light (that I didn't tell you about) was only on because it's service was due. The handbook didn't say anything about this. Anyway it's booked in for it's service and my anxiety levels have reduced. Phew. Also, avoid Christmas Land on Netflix at all costs, it's really bad!</div><br /><p><br /></p>Bouchehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11174056470461569566noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2099903414238447407.post-72876250901798443572020-11-12T13:41:00.000+00:002020-11-12T13:42:48.778+00:00I apologise for my very being! <div class="separator"><br /></div><p>So I’ve had a pretty rubbish few days. This post started out as something very different and I ummed and ahhed as to whether or not to publish it as it was. I decided against it as it served no real purpose as it was so I decided to rewrite it a little before I subjected you all to it.</p><p>I believe I intimated, in my last post, that I would like to move. I have not changed my mind about this but my head is all over the place right now and I don't think I could cope with actually moving right now. I’m trying to keep all my teaching going during lockdown, whilst also keeping the noise down as much as possible so as not to bother my downstairs neighbour. We are a few days in and no complaints so far but I’m not getting complacent. However, this is not the cause of my glumness right now.</p><p>It is no secret that I have lost my mojo when it comes to exercising. I started exercising seriously about 7 years ago but stopped about a year ago now. In that time I’ve put a bit of weight back on and I’m not as fit as I had become. I haven’t given up completely but I just don’t have the energy or mindset to exercise every day. Anyway, on Monday I needed to go to the post office so I thought instead of driving I would walk (it’s about a 25 minute walk to get there and a 25 minute walk back, 5000ish steps). I arrived and there was a queue to get in as, in these days of the pandemic, only 4 people are allowed in at a time. There are signs up to say to keep your distance and another that said “no mask, no service”. Now, I have never had a go at anyone for not wearing a mask as you never know someone’s circumstances, but, if you are not wearing a mask, surely it would then make sense to leave even more space between yourself and others. This was obviously not the thoughts of the woman who queued behind me in the post office. I could sense someone was close and looked behind to see this mask less woman less than a foot from my back. I said, under my mask, “are you actually joking?” and took a step forwards, as there was space, to move away from her but she proceeded to also move forward. “Un-f**king-believable” is the phrase I involuntarily expressed under my breath at her ridiculous behaviour.</p><p>Perhaps she thinks this whole pandemic thing is a hoax and therefore thinks any rules don't apply to her. This is not a debate as to whether the pandemic is real or not, or if we really need masks or not, it is just context for what happened next. Please don’t try and draw me into a discussion as I won’t join in. So, I was served by the lovely post office staff and set off to walk home. I was listening to a podcast as I walked but sensed that a car had pulled up beside me. It was the woman from the post office who had decided to very <b>bravely</b> pull up long enough to say “don’t swear at me in the post office, you fat c**t”. I had enough time to say "I didn't swear at you" which was completely true, then she was gone. I had no opportunity to respond, not that it would have got me anywhere, but this is the second time in the space of a year that this has happened to me. The last time it was at Sainsbury’s when I was told by a very beautiful woman how I am so fat and ugly that I shouldn’t leave the house. All because she was annoyed that, as I was parking my car, she had to wait to get into the car park!?!</p><p>I asked for it this time, and probably the last time too, in that I chose to comment on her behaviour so she had every right to speak back to me about it. I rarely make comment on anything anymore as there is something about me that makes people, in particular, women, very angry. That thing seems to be my appearance. I know I’m not attractive and I am fat, there’s no denying it, but why does my appearance offend people, women, so much. I didn’t think I was so ugly that children would run away screaming or that I’m so fat that I take up two seats on a bus (I fit nice and snugly into one as I should, thank you very much, but if you do take up two seats, so what!). So why do women think it is acceptable to comment on my appearance, no matter how much I have annoyed them?</p><p>I realise I am being ever so sensitive and, chances are, I’ll never see either of these women again, but I was ridiculously upset by what this inconsequential woman said to me, especially when she was the one ultimately in the wrong by standing too close to me in the post office (I say again, my problem was NOT the lack of mask). The problem now is I actually don’t want to leave the house to go anywhere as I don’t want to put anyone off their day. I am brainstorming ideas for a new career that means I won’t have to have contact with many people. I think I reported the first incident at Sainsbury’s on Facebook at the time and people were lovely about it but I do think there must be something in what both of these women (not ladies) said. I could try and lose weight again but even last time, when I was obsessed with exercise, I didn’t lose a lot of weight, I just got fitter so that’s not going to solve the problem my shape and size cause the general population. </p><p><br /></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-WKpe2uZyIss/X605toG-MrI/AAAAAAAACgQ/dFNvMi6uCfgYojVwimHlY81_dhdJRNI3wCNcBGAsYHQ/s750/Blog%2Bpost%2Bpic.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="745" data-original-width="750" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-WKpe2uZyIss/X605toG-MrI/AAAAAAAACgQ/dFNvMi6uCfgYojVwimHlY81_dhdJRNI3wCNcBGAsYHQ/s320/Blog%2Bpost%2Bpic.JPG" width="320" /></a></div><p></p><p><br /></p><p>I would NEVER, EVER bring someone’s appearance into an argument. I may have done so at school but I don’t remember ever doing it. I apologise if I did but it is the sort of language and behaviour that should be left at school. It is a cheap, easy shot that requires no thought. I had SO many comebacks that I could have given had she given me the chance but, as I’m sure most of you will relate to, I thought of most of the really good ones hours after the event. </p><p style="text-align: justify;"><span style="text-align: left;">The logical part of my brain knows I am not completely alone in this and many of you reading this (men and women alike) will have experienced something like this in the past, but today it feels like I am the most offensive person in the world because of my looks. That’s surely not right. No one should be made to feel like that no matter how much they have infuriated someone. I think I am angry with myself for being bothered by something that someone said to me that was in no way clever. Had it been a clever response to what I did then I don’t think I’d feel half as bad.</span></p><p style="text-align: justify;">What I said indirectly to the woman in the post office was not mean but she chose to respond in a mean, unkind, aggressive, cowardly way. I feel better just getting this off my chest, to be honest and I doubt I will be changing career anytime soon. If I do venture out of the house again I will definitely make sure I do not follow her example. Peace out!</p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-6INGCwMEc_c/X606kNjRh3I/AAAAAAAACgc/MAIvYMXsgyAV4t3U228QzIZuVMqaPEViQCNcBGAsYHQ/s1080/What%2Bpeople%2Bsay%2Babout%2Byou%2Bis%2Ba%2Bmanifestation%2Bof%2Btheir%2Bown%2Bthoughts.%2BIt%2Bsays%2Bmore%2Babout%2Bthem%2Bthan%2Byou.%2BTry%2Bnot%2Bto%2Btake%2Bit%2Bpersonally....%2B-Unknown.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1080" data-original-width="1080" height="320" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-6INGCwMEc_c/X606kNjRh3I/AAAAAAAACgc/MAIvYMXsgyAV4t3U228QzIZuVMqaPEViQCNcBGAsYHQ/s320/What%2Bpeople%2Bsay%2Babout%2Byou%2Bis%2Ba%2Bmanifestation%2Bof%2Btheir%2Bown%2Bthoughts.%2BIt%2Bsays%2Bmore%2Babout%2Bthem%2Bthan%2Byou.%2BTry%2Bnot%2Bto%2Btake%2Bit%2Bpersonally....%2B-Unknown.png" /></a></div><br /><p style="text-align: justify;"><br /></p><p style="text-align: justify;"><br /></p>Bouchehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11174056470461569566noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2099903414238447407.post-11942029923795101062020-10-19T14:26:00.007+00:002020-10-26T10:19:05.565+00:00Dizzy! My head is spinning.....<p>Is anyone else binging on webinars right now? It seems the world and his wife are trying to sell online courses right now and they way they hook you is by offering you a free "workshop" to be a part of, but really they just want you to buy their course. I have watched A LOT of these free workshops recently and actually signed up to one course. I squeezed every last bit out of the original lockdown* in the hope that I would have plenty to show for the last 6 months. </p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-9GLhO0cohD8/X43gB369nYI/AAAAAAAACf0/PEr7keQRjys0fh0GICoAC7tJljeWOdWtQCNcBGAsYHQ/s632/E7A637C8-276E-4836-9166-BFD695331F44.jpeg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="443" data-original-width="632" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-9GLhO0cohD8/X43gB369nYI/AAAAAAAACf0/PEr7keQRjys0fh0GICoAC7tJljeWOdWtQCNcBGAsYHQ/s320/E7A637C8-276E-4836-9166-BFD695331F44.jpeg" width="320" /></a></div><p style="text-align: center;"><a href="<a href="https://www.vecteezy.com/free-vector/multitasking">Multitasking Vectors by Vecteezy</a>" target="_blank"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><a href="https://www.vecteezy.com/free-vector/multitasking">Multitasking Vectors by Vecteezy</a></span></a><br /></p><p style="text-align: justify;"><span style="text-align: left;">Unfortunately I have a very short attention span and end up multitasking whilst I do anything these days. I can’t seem to concentrate on one task alone. I start doing one thing and then try to do something else at the same time. Then I find my brain is overloaded and I need to go and binge watch something on Netflix (it’s Cobra Kai at the moment. It’s very, very bad but makes me feel very nostalgic for the 1980s). I am about to get on my exercise bike to do some much needed exercise (lockdown has not been kind to my waistline) but whilst I am peddling I am going to watch a 23 minute video on using iMovie and a 20 minute video about creating Canva vision boards (homework from a social media webinar - part 3 is on Friday).</span></p><p style="text-align: justify;">I don't know if anyone else is feeling like this at the moment but I am constantly tired and constantly annoyed with myself for not doing anything. I have very little get up and go right now. I get up and go out when I have to but the rest of the time I tend to stay in doing very little telling myself I'll do more tomorrow. I don't and then get annoyed with myself for not doing anything and then get annoyed for getting annoyed at myself. I have a constant headache that I can not blame on coffee anymore as I gave it up at the beginning of lockdown and have, on average, one Costa coffee a week now. I know something has to change but I don't know what.</p><p>I need to move, I know that. I have a neighbour who does not enjoy my singing, the word "piercing" was used to describe it by her, therefore, I can't practice at home anymore. Moving in the Greater London area is easier said than done. I need a house with, at least, one room unattached to any neighbouring house so I can sing at home whenever I want. I have a room I can hire at my local church hall but, as the country opens up, and the line dancing and art classes start again, the hall is getting more bookings and it will only be a matter of time until they can not accommodate me anymore. </p><p>I have always been prone to a touch of anxiety but I'm at a new level right now. Unfortunately/fortunately my anxiety manifests itself by me burying my head in the sand, much like an ostrich but without the fantastic legs. I have ideas galore swimming in my head but I do not have the wherewithal to put any new plans into action. I think this is, in part, due to my fear of failure. If I don't try I won't fail but nothing will ever change and I will remain in this perpetual state of stagnation. </p><p>So, what do I do about this? The most important thing to come from this post is that SOMETHING has to change. I am not enjoying everything I do at the moment (although I know I am in a fantastic position right now. I earn enough to pay my rent and buy the odd bottle of Malbec so I KNOW I am very lucky right now). The problem is I am restless. I know what I don't want to do, or rather, what I want to give up but I just don't feel like changing things is the way to go right now. </p><p>Am I wrong, though? Is now precisely the time to change things up? I feel like I am existing rather than living most of the time right now but perhaps this is the best anyone should hope for at the moment. Maybe I should sit tight, stop fretting and keep watching the webinars. They are certainly an excellent way to waste time and, you never know, I might find something I really want to do with the rest of my life that way.</p><p><br /></p><p>*at the time of writing we have only had one full on lockdown in Croydon. If we have another I am not going to waste a second of it (I know that's a lie. I'll be binge watching something by the second day).</p>Bouchehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11174056470461569566noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2099903414238447407.post-27308969649654122462020-08-30T18:33:00.005+00:002020-08-30T19:34:43.935+00:00You can't teach an old dog new tricks....or can you?<p><span style="font-size: medium;">So, a LOT has happened since I last wrote. Pretty much all of it beyond my control. It may surprise you to know I am unable to cure Covid-19, I wish I could, but was never my bag at school so curing a global pandemic would not be listed as one of my skills on my CV. I am, however, considering myself to be a professional tea drinker now. Has anyone else found themselves drowning in tea?</span></p><p><span style="font-size: medium;">I must say the Lockdown that was imposed upon us in the UK has not been all bad for me. It began with me being ill for the first 2 weeks so that wasn't great. I quite possibly had Covid-19 but I didn't get a test so I don't know for sure. However, I didn't leave my flat for 14 days just in case. That was the worst bit I'd say. </span></p><p><span style="font-size: medium;">Once I had recovered, I then had to set about fathoming the online meeting platform that is Zoom in order to run singing lessons and my choir online as well as doing a few bits and pieces for myself. In an effort to keep the kids I teach interested in singing whilst on Zoom, I taught myself how to produce virtual choir videos. I am in no way a master of this but it is a new skill and one I would not have acquired were it not for Lockdown. My video editing skills have gone from very basic to just above basic. I feel like I actually have a hobby now! I don't have a garden, I don't have a great kitchen and though I had intended to read every book on singing going, I didn't. I have attended countless webinars and talks on singing but I am finding concentrating on actual reading to be very difficult right now so the video editing thing became a bit of an obsession. Other ways I have kept busy is by watching old Eurovision Song Contests with friends over Zoom and many, many online quizzes. I thoroughly recommend Steve M's Sunday Lockdown Quiz on Facebook (it will be online for a while yet so have a go).</span></p><p><span style="font-size: medium;">My choir, Songsations, also moved online and I produced 4 virtual choir videos for them too. I have loved working with the choir online and many members of the choir have also enjoyed it. I think it was a bit of a lifeline for some of them. It definitely was for me. The online thing is something I'm going to continue in some capacity for both the choirs and one to one singing lessons. Online meeting platforms are essentially now the norm and will remain part of our lives long after we emerge from this, of that I am sure.</span></p><p><span style="font-size: medium;">Although I saw my income drop by almost exactly 50% I am definitely one of the lucky ones. I have managed to keep my business going and been able to pay my rent. I know many people who have struggled. We have all been forced to think outside the box and find new ways to make a living. </span></p><p><span style="font-size: medium;">So, at the time of writing, August 2020, we are starting to return to our places of work and this adds a new level of pressure. Guidelines for singing, and whether it is safe to do so in the presence of other people, have been released and the consensus seems to be that one to one singing lessons can start again if you can deliver these lessons in a large well ventilated space. My second floor flat no longer cuts it, I fear, and I need to find somewhere else to teach. My downstairs neighbour will be thrilled about that. The hall where I run my choir is, fingers crossed, going to be the place for this from now on. We have to wear face coverings in this hall at the moment but I feel it's worth a go if it means I can be in the same room as my students.</span></p><p><span style="font-size: medium;">That said, I am anxious about starting up again. Not because I'm scared but because nobody really knows what is going to happen once everything does open up again. Will we have a second wave, will I have to self-isolate because I was in a <span color="" style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Caffé</span></span> Nero for more than 15 minutes when another punter with Covid was there? Who knows! And that is the worry. This anxiousness is what is stopping me from starting my choir meeting in person right now. Although the "rules" seem to suggest we can start rehearsing together again it just doesn't feel right yet. The research carried out in the Perform study <span face="" style="color: #333333;">(</span><span face="" style="box-sizing: inherit; color: #333333; font-weight: 700;">P</span><span face="" style="color: #333333;">articulat</span><span face="" style="box-sizing: inherit; color: #333333; font-weight: 700;">E</span><span face="" style="color: #333333;"> </span><span face="" style="box-sizing: inherit; color: #333333; font-weight: 700;">R</span><span face="" style="color: #333333;">espiratory Matter to In</span><span face="" style="box-sizing: inherit; color: #333333; font-weight: 700;">F</span><span face="" style="color: #333333;">orm Guidance for the Safe Distancing of Perf</span><span face="" style="box-sizing: inherit; color: #333333; font-weight: 700;">O</span><span face="" style="color: #333333;">rme</span><span face="" style="box-sizing: inherit; color: #333333; font-weight: 700;">R</span><span face="" style="color: #333333;">s in a COVID-19 Pande</span><span face="" style="box-sizing: inherit; color: #333333; font-weight: 700;">M</span><span face="" style="color: #333333;">ic - catchy) </span>has concluded that singing is no more dangerous than speaking, however, it all comes down to volume. The louder we sing/speak the more aerosols and droplets are emitted. With that in mind I have taken the decision to keep the choir online for the foreseeable. The problem with this is about half of the members of my 2 choirs haven't tried a Zoom session and don't really want to start now, which is a shame, but an understandable one. It's not the same and, to be fair, some people just aren't able to join us online so this is in no way a criticism, just an observation. I may write another post about this, although, as I intimated at the beginning of this post, I am not a scientist.</span></p><p><span style="font-size: medium;">So that's a quick overview of my choir and teaching shenanigans but what of my own singing? Well I was inspired for the first 3 months of Lockdown and then something happened that left me unable to sing at the flat anymore so I've taken a few steps backwards recently. I did manage to book a room in which to do some singing and record some new songs for the choir a couple of weeks ago. I had the whole place to myself and those 3 hours spent singing properly and fully were the best 3 hours I'd had since March. I even managed to record a video, to be included in my choirs "End Of Term" online concert, of me singing an actual song. I have the room booked to do more next week and I can not wait. </span></p><p><span style="font-size: medium;">So there we have it, in a nutshell. There is so much more to discuss but as I haven't posted since February you may well have collapsed due to the shock of me producing something for you to read. I'm quite disappointed in myself that I have had since March 23rd to write something for you and it has taken me until August 30th to actually post something. So as a little extra gift, from me to you, I thought I would share my little video with you here. Excuse my unbrushed hair and the fact I couldn't remember the words so had them up on my phone. To be fair it's a miracle I'm sharing anything right now!</span></p><p><span style="font-size: large;">PS The title of this post may seem a little familiar. It did to me. So I trawled my previous posts and found I had used a similar title before. I'm not going to change this posts title as I can't think of another but if you fancy reading the other post you'll find it </span><a href="https://www.blogger.com/blog/post/edit/preview/2099903414238447407/5419043382116786444" style="font-size: large;" target="_blank">here</a><span style="font-size: large;">. Enjoy.</span></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: medium;"><iframe allowfullscreen="" class="BLOG_video_class" height="266" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/UO9JyGXYjms" width="320" youtube-src-id="UO9JyGXYjms"></iframe></span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: medium;"><br /></span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: medium;">If you’re having trouble opening the video click <a href="https://youtu.be/UO9JyGXYjms" target="_blank">here</a></span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: medium;"><br /></span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: medium;"><br /></span></div><span style="font-size: medium;"><br /></span><p><br /></p>Bouchehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11174056470461569566noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2099903414238447407.post-30080459636408001322020-02-04T13:17:00.001+00:002020-08-29T15:03:36.630+00:00Incompetent by name, incompetent by nature!<div class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 25.6px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 3px;">
<span style="font-size: 19.46px;">It’s been a while hasn’t it! So what has brought me out of the woodwork? Well I have more to say than would be acceptable in a normal Facebook post so I thought I would write a diary entry instead.</span><span style="font-size: 19.46px;"> </span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 19.46px;">Last time I threatened to talk about Brexit but I’m not going to do that. I could write about my choir but I don’t think I’ll do that either (well, perhaps in a roundabout way).</span><span style="font-size: 19.46px;"> </span> <span style="font-size: 19.46px;">What I REALLY want to talk about is The Masked Singer but I have been SO appallingly bad at guessing who they are thus far that I won’t embarrass myself by telling you who I believe them all to be. All I will say is this, if Octopus is not Our Kath (Katherine Jenkins) I will eat ALL my hats.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 19.46px;">Anyway enough of that. Presently, I feel like I’m in limbo. Once again, I’m not sure what I am meant to be doing. I’m just trundling along.</span><span class="s2" style="font-size: 19.46px;"></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 19.46px;">Just when I think things are going well something comes along and pulls the rug out from under me. Up until two weeks ago I was pretty content and then something happened that made me doubt myself and everything around me. Now I can’t get anything done and I have the worst brain fog known to man. I had to get out of the house this morning so am writing this in Costa (standard). I do wonder if I am about to reach that milestone most women reach at some point. No not the moment they try a green olive and think “hmm that’s rather delicious” no the M word (menopause). It would explain the constant forgetfulness, aforementioned brain fog, the crying at anything and everything (I heard a choir of children singing on the radio and that made me go) and the sudden weight gain (absolutely nothing to do with Christmas and zero exercise). Don’t worry boys that’s the last time I’ll mention that word. I really should read a book about it as it’s going to happen but unfortunately, and this could be another symptom, I just can’t be arsed.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 19.46px;">Anyway, I’m not going to go into detail about what happened that dark, chilly January evening as someone who was there might read this and I don’t want anyone thinking I’m having a go (to be fair it was probably my fault that it went the way it did anyway). Last time I wrote about, essentially, not being satisfied with my lot. I work, a lot. Probably too much, but I am on my own, I have to pay the bills (London prices) and don’t want to resort to eating baked beans. I hate baked beans.</span><span style="font-size: 19.46px;"> </span><span class="s2" style="font-size: 19.46px;"></span></div>
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<span class="s2" style="font-size: 19.46px;">The one thing I have done for myself is give myself a day off. This has helped but not enough. I enjoy what I do but the balance isn’t right and I want to create some time (can one create time?) that can be given over to working on my own creativity and not helping others be creative.</span></div>
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<span class="s2" style="font-size: 19.46px;">It’s now a few days later and I have moved to Caffè Nero. The main obstacle standing in my way right now is a lack of self belief. I have feelings of mediocrity in everything I do which leads me into a state of malaise and a total lack of enthusiasm in some aspects of my life. I think I know what I want but fear has a habit of stopping me in my tracks. I also have an awful tendency to let things carry on as they are which means nothing ever changes.</span></div>
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<span class="s2" style="font-size: 19.46px;">I read one of those inspirational quotes yesterday. It said “You are where you are meant to be!” Poppycock. Yes I am sure I’m supposed to be here on earth and alive but when you get down to the nitty gritty am I actually where I’m meant to be? Is anyone meant to be in Croydon? I often wonder, and I am really not sure I’m doing exactly what I am meant to be doing. I want to teach (a bit), I DEFINITELY want to run my choirs but I also fancy doing a bit of singing and at the moment I have no get up and go or drive to sort myself out. </span></div>
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<span class="s2" style="font-size: 19.46px;">So, in these unstable, uncertain times I am thinking of ditching some regular paid work in order to do my own thing. This would free up time for creativity but shouldn’t leave me short financially, if I’m canny about it. Call me crazy but I think it is necessary for my sanity. I will keep you posted (although it could be another year before I write again - if you’re lucky!). </span></div>
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Bouchehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11174056470461569566noreply@blogger.com0